Dearest Loki

Dearest Loki (my bird, not the Norse dude),

It is far too early to be pissed off at your straw toy. You have no less than a half dozen other perches PLUS a boing. Lose the attitude or I just might lose your boca nuts/true fruits treats. Whoopsie!

Lovingly,
Mum

An Open Letter to My Flock

My Beautiful Flock,

Just because I am awake and the sun is up does not mean that you need to air your grievances long and loud. I do not care if your Roudybush to Zupreem ratio is not to your liking. I feel no sympathy for the fact that you dug out your favorite parts of the Nature's Garden blend and are being forced to eat what's left. I am not impressed by your papaya dunking abilities or your predilection for making pellet soup. We have a schedule, you know the schedule and I am not changing the schedule for whatever bug you have up your collective butts. 

Sincerely,
Mum (aka: the woman who feeds you, bathes you, snuggles you AND cleans up your poop)